How to start? … this project, my project, is a dream project that has been going round my head and my heart for a long time, so long that I get used to seeing it as a dream, like that which never comes, something like the ” Romantic love ” that tells us in the stories of lovely princesses and princes, movies and books directed to all ages, that idyll that in real life never or almost never come to be, because almost no one are princesses (And we do not want to be), much less charming princes. But of course, this is absolutely different and so for me … vuala, the day to make my dream come true and not for romantic love, that goes; But as a result of many nights of insomnia, existential crises with headaches, flu, anger, tears, smiles and laughter … and that inner voice that screamed me daring, ATREVETE!
I am an immigrant woman. Give up my nanny job to embark on this adventure and today with all the time in the world, suddenly this dream is something so great that I am here without any guideline more than with my desire to follow this feeling, ummm … I have to organize myself, focus , And daring, that’s what it’s going to cost me the most because I’ve often been afraid of not doing things right, that I can not even fulfill my own expectations that are many. That thousand-year-old fear that binds us and binds us hands and feet, the heart and the mind, the fear that catches us; Because being a woman (we were told) is synonymous with weakness … they can not say “Women should earn less because they are weaker, smaller, less intelligent” were the words of Polish MEP Janusz Korwin-Mikke who deserved several sanctions from the President of the European Parliament Antonio Tajani. But in El Salvador (my country), 85% of single-parent households are headed by women, and from a ceaseless struggle, 20% of women have been reached in positions of power within municipal governments, and women are the owners of the 30 % Of micro and small enterprises, percentages well below ideal; Yet women have built an active, informed feminist movement, transgressing the power established by the patriarchal system within which women are controlled, raped and killed, and we continue in the struggle. Although sometimes and especially in situations in which life tests me I am afraid, at the same time and in an internal struggle to change those centuries of patriarchy I face my demons, that part that represses me and that prohibits my dreams And with much more strength I believe in myself, because I am a rebellious, feminist and dreamy woman, because one becomes tired of being, without being.
Today I have dared to live this wonderful adventure, because I will not stay with that “what if”; And as I said to my husband (who by the way supports me in this beautiful journey), “This has to go well because it is a matter of survival”, of course, because when I give up my work of nanny also renounce the income that That represented and nowadays that is not easy, since in everyday life things are seen as ant-colored; So, it’s like running out of work having to do a lot of work !!!!!! But most of all it is a question of survival of the spirit, of that motivating energy that we carry inside and that keeps moving until we release it and we make “extreme” decisions that change and question our comfortable discomfort in which we believe or pretend to be happy, Tying our dreams. Extreme decisions like when we decide to break with the patterns of domestic violence that lacerate us, hurts us to the marrow and makes us invisible, which kills us; As when we decided to slam the door and leave behind that part of life that does not serve us. Decisions that transgress the established, the “politically correct”, the passive role that we have imposed and continue to impose us only because we are women. Women who walk through life with firm step that we are, confirming precisely our potential and our brightness and not because we are daughters, sisters, mothers, wives, grandmothers … but because we are human beings that by nature are strong, passionate, explosive, Joyful, immensely intelligent, affectionate, determined, courageous, dreamy, political, risky, artists, fragile and powerful, beautiful, scandalous, silent, sportsmen, daring, solidarity and sororarias, fighters of life and for the life that we ourselves decide to live From our own individuality, from that struggle that we fight each day for ourselves and for others.